Bisous Cat's Q & A, Courtesy D. Smith

I ran the idea of Bisous Cat hosting a Q & A show on public television past David. In response, David provided this absolutely perfect script of how such a show would progress. Please note, Raffi is my parent's ambiguously gay cat. He has a British accent and heaven knows how he ended up in Kentucky. Isabel is my sweet, darling, loving cat, who happens to rub against anyone and everyone. Snickers is Cassie's long-haired cat who may or may not be fatter than Bisous Cat (and Bisous Cat is huge).

Voici David's masterpiece: 

BISOUS CAT: Please welcome our wegular guest, Isabel.

(APPLAUSE)

ISABEL: Meow . . .

BISOUS CAT: Shut up Isabel, no-one's intewested. Go and find a lap you haven't sat on yet. If you can. All the way fwom Kentucky, Waffi!

(APPLAUSE)

RAFFI: Yes, it's, er, charming to be in Michigan. I say, is there a decent bathhouse anywhere around here?

BISOUS CAT: Why don't you just lick yourself like evewyone else?

RAFFI: Er, well, it's not so much the cleaning aspect I'm looking for. . .

BISOUS CAT: And speaking of cats who don't clean themselves, please welcome Snickews!

(APPLAUSE)

SNICKERS: None of you have any fashion sense to wear your fur long.

BISOUS CAT: And none of us have our fuw wecognized as a national park.

RAFFI: Oh, MEOW!

SNICKERS: Or have our ass recognized as a planet. Oh, wait, I believe NASA's trying to contact you now. . .

RAFFI: Oh, this is going to be FUN. Someone bring me a martini. . .